Looking forward and looking back

Working with younger people who ask lots of questions about your career (in an attempt to foresee their own career paths) can make you more introspective.

One young person, bored with his current assignment at work, asked me what motivated me. I told him that over the years, much of the work I had done seemed pretty much like a variation on the same theme, so it wasn't the tasks that motivated me (I've never been very keen on programming anyway), but instead, it was the desire to do a good job that provided motivation. I don't think he liked that answer because it didn't give him what he needed to keep at his assignment. He's on a different project now!

However, he got me thinking about the last time I really looked forward to something on a day-to-day basis. The one thing that really stood out was music class and band practice in high school. That was a really long time ago (more than 15 years now).

I miss having something like that in my life and I miss making music, but I haven't been able to find something that can fill that hole, at least not yet. I'd like to get back into music, but I'm not sure in what form yet.

There are other things I look forward to, though, so life's not as hopeless and sad as I made it out to be! I look forward to working in the garden, I look forward to making changes to my house, and especially, I look forward to learning new things (not so much of programming-related things, though). I really enjoyed the home renovation course, and the Spanish classes I took a while ago.

I miss creating artwork too. I haven't been inspired to draw or paint in a long time. I don't know why. I used to draw all the time when I was a kid. I need to find that inspiration again.